Remember when you were a kid and your parents and teachers tried to get you to play nice with the other children? You didn't listen, did you?
If that describes you, then you're probably still doing the same thing, except now, you're doing it at work. And I can tell you this: It'll come back to haunt you, someday.
Yeah, I know what people say. They say that nice guys finish last. That bullies and jerks get away with it. Well, people who say that are whiny, wimpy dopes. More importantly, they're wrong.
Sure, aggressive bullies that rip people apart at the first sign of weakness and also happen to have the capabilities of a Steve Jobs or Bill Gates may very well get away with it. But you won't. Not only that, you'll also end up the most hated person at work if you ...
Brag about your sex life. Come on, that's just creepy. Besides, most people either aren't getting any, aren't getting enough, or who knows what. If you're telling the truth, folks will be resentful. If you're exaggerating, they'll think you're a jerk. Either way, you lose.
Prolong meetings with inane questions and rants. The only thing people hate more than meetings is meetings that are longer than they have to be. There's always some moron who takes over and makes it her own personal soapbox.
Boast about your financial prowess. There's always someone who insists on talking about his stock portfolio, home remodel, hot new car, family trust, or some other surreptitious way of making sure you know he's better off than you. Everyone hates that, now more than ever.
Kiss up to the boss. And actually getting "in" with the boss is probably worse. That sort of thing has a way of being temporary, and when it's over, it's like the prison guards have suddenly disappeared and left you all alone with an angry mob.
Open your big mouth. This was me as a young manager: "It's not fair that execs get to fly business class internationally and managers don't." So what happened? New rule: nobody gets to fly business class internationally. Everybody's pissed off. Lesson learned: don't stir up the pot and keep your big mouth shut.
Gush about that promotion or raise. So obvious but so many people do it. I'm not saying you should feel bad about it or deny it if you're asked a direct question, but for God's sake, celebrate in private, not with coworkers. They may act happy for you, but they're not.
Act like an aggressive bully. If you're the leader of the pack, maybe you'll get away with it. But things have a way of changing in the workplace. Someday, you'll lose that power. And when you do, you'll pay, just like in the animal kingdom.
Blab about stuff you get away with. If you somehow manage to scam some extra time off or something, be discrete. Don't run around telling people. They'll cry to the boss and everyone will be pissed off about it -- including the boss.
Overplay your hand. There's always one guy who thinks he's so much better than he really is. If you're that guy, not only will everyone think you're a delusional dope, but sooner or later, the powers that be will find a way to put you in your place.
Stab good people in the back. Let's face it: if the guy's a jerk, go ahead, do an end-around, stab him in the back, do whatever you want. People love that stuff. Just don't do it to a nice guy. If you can't stand him for whatever reason, find some other way to express it.
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